Sparrow Speaks: She’s Just Not That into You, Page 2

PANEL 1

Rachel and her male companion are at what appears to be a social gathering. A beautiful woman with flowing hair (Sparrow) is visible.

YOUNG MAN: "I wonder if there are ways you can tell when a girl just isn't that into a guy?"

SPARROW: "PPFt, guys are clueless. They never know when to quit."

PANEL 2

The young man turns toward Sparrow hopefully while Rachel looks annoyed.

RACHEL: muttering "I hope you both get herpes."

YOUNG MAN: "Hey, Sparrow, how about we catch a movie—"

SPARROW: "No."

SPARROW: "See what I mean?"

PANEL 3

Sparrow addresses the reader directly, giving dating advice. She has long flowing hair.

SPARROW: "She's just not that into you when..."

PANEL 4

Illustration showing a woman stepping backward from a man.

TEXT: "...She steps backward every time you step forward. She doesn't want to get closer to you."

PANEL 5

Illustration showing a man trying to talk to a disinterested woman.

TEXT: "She answers your questions monosyllabically."

MAN: "So, do you come here often?"

WOMAN: "Yes."

MAN: "Would you like to—"

WOMAN: "No."

The fact that Rachel wishes sexually transmitted diseases on her two slutty companions is disconcerting yet somehow adorable. I am certain anyone who has actually had an STD or knows someone who died of one would feel differently. I apologize for my inability to write non-offensive snarkiness. Maybe one day I will get that down. Or stop snarking.

Did I mention I love the “Sparrow Speaks” comics because they allowed me to write about all the sex-related things I was finding out while my character remained virginal? Never did get around to writing the installment that changed that.

Comments (Archived)

  1. E

    2nd-from-last panel is pretty obvious… probably less obvious (and certainly more difficult to escape from) when it takes place on a couch or a car seat…