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Subculture of One
SubcultureofOne.com
Watching Science Fiction
with Rachel the Great
By Rachel Nabors
A retro TV displays the title.
PANEL 1
Rachel lies on the couch with Tuna while watching TV.
RACHEL: "Why are clones always inherently evil?"
RACHEL: "They're just exact genetic copies!"
PANEL 2
Rachel continues her critique while gesturing at the TV. Tuna watches beside her.
RACHEL: "Oh come on! There's no sound in space!"
RACHEL: "There's no atmosphere to carry the vibrations!"
PANEL 3
Rachel's frustration intensifies. Tuna holds up a sign that says "Down in Front!"
RACHEL: "Why the hell do 90% of aliens look like humans?"
TUNA: "Down in Front!"
RACHEL: "And why must their females all sport large breasts?"
RACHEL: "You can't tell me that mammals evolved on every life-bearing planet."
I’m a huge Star Wars fan, but I always had these same complaints. I refuse to call it “science fiction,” because there’s nothing even remotely scientific about it. I prefer “space fantasy.” Don’t even get me started on the Asari from Mass Effect…
I always wondered that about clones too. I wish they’d do a movie where the clone was evil and it was that way because of a latent evil in the “good” guy he was cloned from…
Okay, I can answer some of those questions…
My dad has banned me from his room while science fiction. Even though I hate doing science in school, science (taught the right way) has always appealed to me. So if I see something in a movie or show that is supposed to be “science” fiction, I instantly criticize everything that isn’t scientifically correct. I figure if they don’t want people to complain about it, they should make it where the fact sounds factual and is believable and realistic. Or quit never to write science fiction again.